Minutes of the Pembroke College Winnie-the-Pooh Society

Held on: 24th June 2000 in Granny's Room
Present: Claire, Claire's Mum, Jeremy, Rob, Granny, and Ben.


  1. Rob open's the meeting in his traditional flamboyant style.

  2. We congratulate him on getting a first. Git. We could all get one too if we spent less time sitting around drinking tea and writing minutes. Doh.

  3. We show some photos around. Jeremy, unsurprisingly, has lots of pictures of his various womenfolk.

  4. We vote to censure Rob for trying to donate the Society's own ears which we gave him several years ago back to the society. F:3 A:0 Abs:1. Making tea:1.

  5. Claire has Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaakeeeeeeeeeeee. And it's yummy.

  6. Claire's mum can be mother as she has more experience than most of us. Otherwise we'll tell Claire's dad about what Claire's mum did at the May Ball....

  7. Dave Henderson is mentioned.

  8. The light turns yellow as Ben goes for the Biscuit.

  9. Rob's got a dinner date. Ahhhhh!

  10. With Magnus. Eeuuuurghhh.

  11. Teen sluts do it all for Ben via e-mail. (N.B I would claim this were libel if I hadn't written it myself- Piglet)

  12. We are drinking Liz's milk.

  13. Rob got a distinction in his oral.

  14. You will note, by this point, that we are in the gutter. At least it means that the tone of these minutes can't possibly descend any lower.

  15. If a Diploma in Computer Science is a Dip Comp. Sci, is one in Theology a Dip. God. Sci? These Questions Have to Be Asked.

  16. Balls!

  17. There is gossip at the ball. It seems certain members of the society spent most of it witnessing one of the most spectacular arguments about who was two-timing who in the first year. They still haven't worked it out, but watch this space.

  18. Betty needs more black bags. This minute may have relevance to someone, so I've left it in. Beats me, though.

  19. Claire's mum realises that Granny's Sad. Votes to congratulate Claire's Mum. It took us until at least the end of Fresher's week. F;2 A:0 Abs: 2.

  20. The Junior Proctor Simon Redfern's Legs enter the conversation.

  21. Rob feels small when he goes to the tailors. We've always known....

  22. Brian had Briony in the Pizza Place. For a meal, or course.

  23. We vote to censure something or other as Rob leaves.

  24. We criticise the changes to the web pages. Especially frames.

  25. Votes to censure Owen for said frames. F:2 A:0 Abs:2. Carried, harshly, but, as is the poohsoc way, democratically....

  26. Votes to make Dan and Lucy for a meal at Brown's. F:1 A:0 Abs:2. They never did, incidentally, so they should face the wrath of poohsoc if they ever turn up again....

  27. Granny reads "At the Zoo".

  28. Dan and Lucy enter. They leave surprisingly quickly, before we can tell them about the Brown's thing.

  29. Jeremy can do Rabbit if necessary. I think she might have a few things to say on that matter, however....

  30. Ben daringly hacks into Granny's e-mail account, and sends lewd e-mail to the FBI, CIA, MI6, and the problem page editor of Women's Realm. Oh, what japes!

  31. Claire's doing it on her own regardless. Claire's Mum agrees that it sounds fun.

  32. That's the reading

  33. Jeremy looks like Worzel Gummidge.

  34. "Plot? Help!"- Granny.

  35. Jeremy reads a poem in the style of Elvis, uh-huh-huh, Thank you very much.

  36. The Reading attempts to surface, and succeeds. It is the Old Testament Chapter 3, "In which Pooh and Piglet go hunting and nearly catch a Woozle".

  37. Jeremy now reads in the style of a very bad B-movie. He obviously has a hidden lack of talent.

  38. Magnus enters behind Ben, and withdraws just as quickly. (Who writes this crap?) Why is it that people do not want to stay and have Tea with us?

  39. "Christopher Robin comes slowly down his tree."

  40. "That wasn't so painful".

  41. Jeremy refuses to do Roo. Bad show.

  42. Jeremy composes himself. He is now in three movements, with a nice recapitulation towards the end of the crescendo at the beginning of the allegro.

  43. "Look at me swimming." (c.f Christopher Robin quote above.)

  44. Claire's been in reception with little children this month.

  45. "It's putting on little boys trousers I find really hard." - Claire.

  46. "Well, get Ben to explain what he does and do it all backwards." Inevitably Granny.

  47. Granny mentions the euro symbol, purely to be a git when I have to type the minutes up. However, I can type €, though expect it to be about 25% smaller by the time it's read out. Also, to be a git to the person that reads out the minutes, please find attached the following Gurmukhi characters. Gurmukhi Characters

  48. No, I don't know what a Gurmukhi is either.

  49. Narging happens as Granny e-mails.

  50. Claire's mum expects to have a joint in her oven tonight.

  51. Oyster stout. Oh yes.

  52. Homerton college is no more, being only a shell for it's true purpose as a conference centre.

  53. We vote to close. F:2 A:1 Abs:1. The meeting was closed.


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©The Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society 2000.

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