PEMBROKE COLLEGE WINNIE-THE-POOH SOCIETY

Minutes of the Elevenses Meeting, 24/04/99

Held in Room CC32, Pembroke College.
Present: Ben, Jon, Yasmin, Martin, Jenny, Andrew, Jeremy, Anthony, Chris, Belinda, Mad Jenny, Claire, Alison, Brian.
Apologies: Kirsten (because of feeding a baby)
Guests: Richard, Neil, Gina, MattMattKallistiMatt, Rob (an accomplice to Brianing)


  1. Andrew declares the meeting open, because Ben is missing.

  2. Minutes Apparently Mad Jenny is knocking off members of Poohsoc one by one.

  3. Granny is called a babe, but this is recorded as being a baby, and the membership agrees that this is far more amusing. Furthermore, apparently, Anfoni is a sexist.

  4. However, he has asked the Cherwell (the Varsity of the Other Place) to advertise a Varsity Poohsticks match. Suggestions are made to play Poohsticks on Hammersmith Bridge, but the outcome of the discussion was unfortunately not recorded.

  5. Anfoni has got a terrible picture of Belinda.

  6. Ben and Mad Jenny arrive. Ben, presumably having other things on his mind, is not only late but has forgotten last week's minutes.

  7. We debate when we should hold the Garden Party - the discussion somehow peters out though, and for its gripping denouement you will have to read on.

  8. Granny says that he had something with Becky, but Jenny rapidly prevents us finding out what, for which we should probably be thankful.

  9. Anfoni officially has a house next year in York. This makes a hundred per cent of Poohsoc lawyers who have gone to York after leaving Cambridge - most curious. Perhaps he and the James-in-Exile are in a conspiracy.

  10. Mad Jenny reads last week's minutes, to herself.

  11. It is alleged that Jenny looks like Ben's gran, but this would mean she's related to Ben and is thus rightly treated as an insult.

  12. Mad Jenny is prevailed upon (oo-er) to read the minutes out loud, and does so.

  13. It is officially (but unfairly) noted that meeting a mad psychotic axe-murderer is preferable to meeting Scary Clare.

  14. Granny locks the assembled members in to prevent him being squashed should any more suddenly try to gain entrance.

  15. Despite this ploy, the meeting is suddenly and surprisingly added to by a Jon, and an Alison with a Matt, as well as Geoffrey the Master's cat who followed them for no very clear reason.

  16. The cat leaves, and Jon takes over the minutes. It is suggested that the cat may have been deputizing for Lady Tomkys.

  17. Shockingly and sadly Jeremy has not seen very much Sesame Street: we lament this. In fact, it transpires, by and large it is the arts types who watched it, and not the scientists. There may be research funding in this.

  18. Apparently however Jeremy is often brought to tears by the Teletubbies.

  19. It is officially recorded that Jon has no appetite for Alison. It must be his time of the month or something.

  20. Mad Jenny continues to read the minutes, with editorial comments.

  21. Yasmin is concerned by the prohibition on letters between W and Y, as if it's inclusive she can't spell herself.

  22. Jenny is apparently also like Jeremy's aunt.

  23. Dave Henderson is confused with an ex-Hawkwind bass player.

  24. Last year has been swept under the carpet apparently. A close inspection by Jon reveals that it is in fact still there, a ringing testimony to Pembroke's bedders.

  25. At Jon's suggestion, we will evaluate potential contenders for the currently-vacant James-ship according to innuendo in the reading.

  26. Anfoni is covered in cake.

  27. In a sudden resumption of discussion, we settle on the 14th June for the Garden Party. Jon is to book the lawn. From the discussion we preserve the following little vignette:

  28. Susan Stobbs is to be invited, along with all the Honorary Members. Dave Henderson is expressly not to be invited, but the old member of the Milne Society most definitely is. Granny will give the Secretary appropriate invitation slips and he will expedite this forthwith.

  29. According to Richard, Sir Robin Janvrin is the Queen's new PPS: we take note of this for her invitation.

  30. Vote that Jenny wear Rob's ears and tail for the party, if they are to be found: F., 6, Ag., 1, Abs., 6; carried.

  31. Poohsticks with paper sticks and a fan is suggested as Garden Party entertainment. Possibly Granny was right about the quality of the tea.

  32. The Reading is "In Which Piglet does a Very Grand Thing", decided by vote (F., 6, Ag., 3, Abs., 5; carried).

  33. Vote that Matt be allowed to vote (after some confusion between the Matt and the mat, which shouldn't be allowed to vote as it has no hands it can raise): F., 9, Ag., 2, Abs., 1; carried.

  34. Vote to censure Jeremy for suggesting seriousness, carried all but unanimously far too quickly to be counted properly.

  35. Anfoni turns Pooh's speech into ToniBlairSpeak for us.

  36. Everybody, especially Jeremy and Granny and Anfoni, contend for the James-ship in fine style.

  37. We vote to censure Anfoni for politics: F., 7, Ag., 3, Abs., 4; carried.

  38. We vote to censure Anfoni for offering to censure himself for interrupting, carried by a silly (but valid) number.

  39. Brian and Rob arrive: this takes us up to fifteen people and thus the meeting is now by College rules officially a Party. This is good, since it allows Richard to 'get out more' without having to get up.

  40. Vote to allow Rob to vote: F., 12, Ag., 3, Abs., 2; carried.

  41. Ben's voice may be breaking! "Not before time," pronounces Richard.

  42. Vote to censure Jon for suggesting the innuendo competition, which has become silly: F., 8, Ag., 4, Abs., 4; carried. We also vote to stop: F., 10, Ag., 3, Abs., 3; carried.

  43. Dave Henderson nearly enters the meeting but our enthusiastic greeting causes him to run away very quickly.

  44. Brian is trying to undress Ben and Mad Jenny, who has a stud apparently (but we've known that about Ben for ages... )

  45. Belinda offers her room under pressure for next week (AA43).

  46. We conceive of a plan to put pictures of Joy and Dave Henderson outside each other's spy-holes, thus ensuring that neither will ever open their doors again. It's brilliant! It must be done!

  47. We hold an election to the post of James! Candidates are: Jeremy, and to make up the running, Neil the Teddy Bear. Voting is as follows:
    Jeremy: 8
    Neil: 7
    R. O. N.: 0
    Abs. 2

    Jeremy is thus elected! Hurrah! (Close thing though wasn't it?)


  48. Having thus concluded all our business, we vote to close: F., 10, Ag., 3, Abs., 2.


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