Meeting of the Pembroke College Winnie-the-Pooh Society held in the Kitchen, 40 Panton St., on the 4th October 1997 (first of term!!)

Present: Russel (Alison’s Friend, a Poohsoc First, Ben, Jenny, Alison, Anfony, Rob.)

  1. The final meeting of last term not having closed, we continue it with glee.

  2. Ben mumbles about the fun he had last night when he swapped someone’s vodka for vodka. Oh, the joys of Student Life.

  3. Rob reads the minutes of the last two meetings.

  4. Some rather sorry tarts are laid on the table, which surprised Ben, as he hadn’t seen anybody from New Hall for ages….

  5. Alison proudly shows off her testaments. The operation was, apparently, a complete success. (Note: This testament joke was obligatory, it’s in the contract, I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do about it.)

  6. The meeting being 18 weeks old, we decide it’s about time we raise a pooh levy. We vote on this (F:2 Ag:1 Abs:1). The Pooh Levy is payable by the end of October.

  7. Jenny pays Ben. Ben Pays Ben. Ben resolves to pay the treasurer this money; Sibylle has paid in kind with some Gummi Bears and some delicious chocolate, which we vote to embezzle without delay.

  8. We discuss the Squash. Ben, Jenny, Alison volunteer. Honey sandwiches are suggested, and Alison volunteers to provide the honey from her own collection of pots.

  9. At this point the minutes read that Anthony is donating a Russian. He wrote them, so we expect it at the next meeting.

  10. Ben declares that he’ll miss Jon. We suggest beatifying, canonising, honourizing him, and then we decide that the highest honour is to be made an Honourary member of the Society. F:3 A:1 Abs:1

  11. As this would probably make him so big-headed that he’d get stuck in his front door if he tried to leave, we vote not to tell him. F:3 A:0 Abs:2. As he’s probably going to read these minutes via the Internet anyway, he’ll find out eventually, though….

  12. We vote (after a long time) to allow Russel to vote for the duration of the meeting. F:2 A:0 Abs:2

  13. We read the Varsity article about the Sheila and her Dog Society (spit, spit) being sweet. In this respect, we vote unanimously to censure Varsity really very badly, and to write to them, although we stop short of Russel’s suggestion of “sending the boys round.”

  14. Anfony notices that the tarts are gone… But, to everyone’s delight, they are replaced with Jaffa Cakes!

  15. I would like to make it clear that several of the following minutes were not written by me (Ben), but by Anfony, and are direct quotes, and I’ve got the evidence to prove it. Oh yes.

  16. VICKY arrives! Gorgeous as usual, sparkling hazel eyes and pearly teeth. Stunning purple top with WHITE buttons- and a tan that would shame a native Indian. Her voice, soft and gentle, shimmered across the dry air that inhabits the kitchen here. Peace settled like a newly washed sheet on a Fresher’s bed.

  17. It is evident from the above that Anfony is clearly considering going through puberty.

  18. Vicky offers her room for some activities next Saturday…. And Poohsoc as well. (Definitely Puberty.)

  19. Discussion jumps to Jon. Has she been in “touch” with him?

  20. Ben declares that he can’t argue with Vicky- she always comes out on top with him

  21. Tuesday 14th is Pooh’s Birthday- we vote unanimously to have a formal hall or perhaps a pooh-b-q in his honour. Unanimous, less the James’ abstention, of course.

  22. Ben starts mumbling about Vicky in a short skirt (Rob’s suggestion)- and lots of “Pooh Girls”, an attractive alternative to the Spice girls, in order to pull the men….. into the society. Ben’s going to hide for the day- we do miss Hunk-man Jon.

  23. Votes to postpone the EGM, so as not to make things too hectic next week. F:3 A:3 Abs:1. So the EGM will go ahead.

  24. Ben calls a committee meeting to overturn this decision. As Vicky doesn’t want the EGM, she votes in favour of overturning the vote, the James abstains, so we won’t have an EGM next week.

  25. Ben starts to witter about his mother bringing him up, and then throwing him up, and mats with pooh on, and Brown’s restaurant, but there is much confusion, so I’ll stop this minute right now.

  26. We discuss the general unpopularity of Rabbit as a pooh character. No definitive conclusion is reached.

  27. We vote to censure Rob for forgetting the coasters and the sticker book. F:1 A:3 Abs:2. Defeated.

  28. There is a suggestion (more or less certainly by Ben) of encouraging more female members by offering a 25 percent reduction per breast. Then we realise that this would mean that Simon Olsen would get in for free, and we’d have to pay Rachel Dixon to join…

  29. To commemorate the Second Coming of the Lady Foundress, we read the first chapter of the New Testament.

  30. We realise that all dogs like pooh- ooh!

  31. Ben mentions the thinness of Rob’s stool. Silence grips us all.

  32. Christopher Robin appears to have a rubber fetish. He ran into the wood wearing a long rubber overcoat- but what was underneath?

  33. Piglet was tiddly-pomming in between a gruff Pooh.

  34. Vicky goes red, and laughs hysterically, pointing at a “plate on a tree” or something. Rob then starts throwing plates. Private problems, possibly.

  35. Pooh made welcoming noises as he came round the corner.

  36. Eeyore does something twice on a Thursday- like Alison, although no-one knows about it, apparently.

  37. We vote to close, finally. F:4 A:1 Abs: 1

Return To Michaelmas 1997

©The Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society 1997.

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