Minutes of the Pembroke College Winnie-the-Pooh Society, held in the Secretary’s room, 2 Selwyn Gardens on the 6th December 1997

Present: Jeremy, Granny, Anfoni, Anfoni’s friend who doesn’t want to give her name on the basis she may incriminate herself, although her nickname may or may not be Clara, Jenny, Ben, Stephen, Rob, Vicky (Mrs Specterman, not the Treasurer)
Apologies: Jimes (on his way back to Australia)

1. The meeting was opened by the Secretary in his role as deputy of the President, who had so far steadfastly refused to turn up and open the meeting. Soon afterwards, Ben arrives, starts to open the meeting, finds that the meeting is already open, and stops in mid-sentence to rudely enquire who Anfoni’s friend is.
   


2. There are lots of biscuits, Yule logs, High Class tarts, ginger nuts, and mince pies provided. We feel suitably Christmasy.
   


3. We vote to censure Jon for failing to carry out his sentence of singing the more it snows (Tiddly - Pom) in a cold place, because it didn’t even look like snow. As it snowed only a couple of days afterwards, we feel we are justified, not that the Poohsoc needs a justification when censuring the Jarrett is concerned. F:9 A:0 Abs:1
   


4. There is much discussion of strange accents and nicknames. Or maybe we discussed nicknames in strange accents. Who knows? Who cares?
   


5. Quote of the week: A rugby schoolboy, up for interview, about a certain not very well liked member of college: “ Oh Christ, he’s not here is he?”
   


6. Ben is censured for quoting Monty Python in a Poohsoc meeting, F:5 A:4 Abs:1. Justly close, due to the large Pythonic presence in the room.
   


7. Stephen has provided great biscuits. It’s a fact, no vote is taken.
   


8. We find out Anfoni’s friend is in fact called Tamara, possibly. He claims he met her in the summer. Normally we’d tease him about her, but as she’ll read this, we’ll put it down to too much tea.
   


9. We agree there is a problem in having two Vickys in the Society. To solve the problem, we agree to call Rob’s “friend” Vicky “Mrs Specterman,” as it is well known that they act like an old married couple. To further aid us in our differentiation of the two, we vote to call Vicky the Treasurer “Barbara” from this point forward, or at least until we get bored. She may be known as “Babs” for short. F:7 A:2 Abs:1
   


10. We vote to allow Anfoni’s friend thingy to vote for the duration of the meeting. F:5 and 1 foot, A:2, Abs:0. Doesn’t add up, but still. Motion carried.
    


11. Granny talks about the class 158s through Ely station.
    


12. We are so fascinated that we only wake up when Babs comes off the phone, and startles us by producing an immaculate set of minutes by none other than Jon Jarrett, esq. himself.
    


13. Rob, by precedent, reads the minutes.
    


14. We would just like it stated here, for general approval, as well as embarrassment value at some point in the future, that Alison is going out with a comsci. Not just a normal comsci, but a graduate comsci. We feel sorry for her, as she’s been dragged to some comsci convention, and therefore cannot come to Poohsoc.
    


15. Babs wonders why she’s being called Babs.
    


16. We vote that Ben be allowed to thank Jon for the minutes by means of a Christmas card: F:8 A:2 Abs:2
    


17. We vote to censure Jeremy for reading non-Pooh material in a meeting. F:9 A:2 Abs:1. Silly boy.
    


18. We vote to stop making silly votes in the meeting. F:0 A:9 Abs:1 Asleep:1. We fail, and long may pointless voting continue.
    


19. We agree to see if it possible to try heavy breathing by e-mail in light of the dodgy phone calls received at Selwyn gardens. An interesting experiment, with a few technical problems.
    


20. Jeremy talks to fax machines in his spare time. You’d never have guessed!
    


21. The reading is Chapter 3 of the Old Testament, “In which Pooh and Piglet go hunting and nearly catch a Woozle”.
    


22. Rob passes photos around, while everyone laughs at Ben as Piglet. I see no reason for such pointless mirth, but there you go….
    


23. Pooh went home for it, apparently.
    


24. Babs is still confused by the entire Babs thing. We explain, but keep on doing it.
    


25. There is a ring on the intercom, followed by some heavy breathing. Perhaps its a Woozle. We edge away from the door.
    


26. We vote to censure everyone at Selwyn gardens for no apparent reason. F:5 A:5 Abs:0. The motion is hung. We will find some visitors later.
    


27. We read a second chapter, Chapter 4 of the Old Testament, “In which Eeyore loses a tail and Pooh finds one.”
    


28. Anfoni thinks clouds are phallic. Vicky thinks they are breast-like. This probably shows something deep and meaningful about their childhoods, which definitely needs further investigation by a qualified psychotherapist.
    


29. We vote to censure the growing debate on the grimness of up north. F:7 A:1 Abs:1. It will never darken our doorstep again. And it’s a pointless debate, as it’s obviously grim up north.
    


30. We note that Wol’s house is called CHEST NUTS, and has both a KNOCKER and a BELL PULL. Unless we are reading too much in, there’s something significant there.
    


31. Babs asks us to note the orthographic variation between “REQUIRD” and “REQUID” on Wol’s door notices. We nod and smile in the hope that she won’t continue. She doesn’t.
    


32. Babs only gets excited by a Big Something. Oh yes? We hope she finds the satisfaction that she so richly deserves.
    


33. We decide that Poohmas is not as good as Christmas, because it could be confused with a Greek dip.
    


34. Rob comes to settle the vote on whether we should censure everyone at Selwyn gardens. He agrees, and we do.
    


35. Anthony did not bring his calendar to show us, but promises to do so next time. We also note with regret that we do not yet have the promised stuff from Jacyntha, head of our Californian Chapter.
    


36. We vote to close for the Christmas Vac. F:5 A:5 Abs:0. Critically hung, we are fortunate that Rob is still with us to decide that Poohsoc, barring very special circumstances, is closed for another year.
    

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