Hustings For The Position Of President Of The Pembroke College Winnie-The-Pooh Society

(Owen Barritt 24 February 2001)

To be or not to be, that is how I started my hustings last year. However, I shall give a different speech this year for it has been a year of 365 days. As it is this past year that I have shown myself to be worthy of the position of President.

It has been a year of remarkable achievement for the society, including free diaries and a 1.50 biscuit voucher. A total 14 letters have been sent by this Foreign Secretary, to places such distant places as America and Churchill. Achievement through dedication what more could you ask of the next President, and I shall tell you.

A wise man once said, "Outside of a dog a book is a man's best friend", however it must be pointed out that inside a dog it's too dark to read. Therefore, if you elect me a president I shall take steps to ensure that we never hold a meeting inside a dog.

This is a very traditional society and it is fast becoming a tradition to have a Mathmo as president. After at least four and a half years of mathmo rule, it would be wrong to lose this tradition. Therefore, vote for me and help the society continue this fine tradition.

As is usual when running for election I shall now make a few comments about my opposition. RON would certainly make a poor president. Firstly, a brief look through the minutes would show that in fact he has never attended a single meeting. For that matter he is not even, a member of the society and so is not even eligible for the post. RON has continually fail to be elected for every single position in the Society and in many other Societies as well. I ask you do you want this failure as your president. If not then vote for me.

I was me last year and I am still me this year (surprisingly). Therefore, the simple fact remains that you should vote for me, because I am well and truly and utterly me.


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©Owen Barritt 2001.

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